January check-in

Woohoo – it’s all happening!

Productivity, creativity, excitement, inspiration, abundance. January’s turning out to be a good month, and an excellent beginning to what I’m sure will be a very, very good year for me. Relationships on track. Body feeling good. Finances sorting themselves out. Career poised for change and development. And I believe it’s because I’ve tuned back into my intuition – more than I was last year, at least. So I’m making good decisions and it feels like I’m really operating on a higher frequency. Long may it last.

HoneyChild

Big shifts

Since I returned from the Christmas break I’ve decided to change the structure of my career radically and start working for myself this year. It’s the natural evolution of all the thinking and soul searching and prospecting I did in 2010, and it’s all felt relatively easy and synchronous by comparison. I’ve already told my company and started my planning in the space of a few days. Amazing how fast it’s all happened – but it’s been a long time coming and I’m totally ready…like an autumn leaf…

I’ve preferred to contain all of that business-related thinking in a separate journal. It’s been useful to write with pen and ink as I formulate my ideas and go through quite a challenging, emotional process, and more appropriate to keep in entirely confidential.

I’m feeling inspired, and excited – my only wobble thus far has been telling my dad and not feeling as supported by him in my decision as I would have liked. But if I believe in myself and my own ability, others will too. And I’ve had nothing but love, support and enthusiasm from the handful of other people who know my news.

So here’s to a fruitful 2011…bring it.

HoneyChild

Reflecting on 2010 - my year in (dodgy) pictures

I vowed at the beginning of 2010 that I would take more photos, and document our lives better for us to look back and remember what we’ve done. But this morning, looking through the shots of me from the last year, I’m not sure I like what I see. In almost every one I seem to be vacant – drunk, posing, looking as hot as possible. I had a lot of fun, clearly – but not good, clean fun.

On the whole, I’d be ashamed to show my parents my 2010 in pictures.

So as I think about the next year, I’m making just one resolution – to ensure that my life looks healthier, cleaner and more wholesome on film.

I’m on my way home this afternoon for a week – happy holidays everyone.


HoneyChild

Messages in the wind

It’s interesting that since I decided make a renewed, conscious effort to tune into my spiritual side, I’ve been given lots of reassurance. I was offered a reading the other day, quite by surprise, from a very intuitive lady who told me I had strong psychic ability.

Yesterday I repeatedly got the message “Everything’s going to be ok” in totally obscure and unexpected places (graffiti, copy in a magazine I seldom read). Wondering what that’s about. I’ve written before about signs from the universe or the angels or whatever… It feels nice to hear from them again!

What I find amusing is that this has all coincided with my starting to run more regularly and making an effort to be outside in the fresh air more. It’s been incredibly windy and that’s been annoying me, but come to think of it, this weekend I was told that God shows him/itself in the wind. So I’ll take the current blustery weather as another encouragement to stay in tune with my concept of god. And as a Gemini, with air as my element, I need to make peace with the wind.

I’m looking forward to going home for Christmas where long, invigorating walks are a daily occurrence and nature is basically all there is. And I’ll keep my eyes and ears and heart open.


HoneyChild

Thinking about my spirituality

My spiritual journey seems to have hit a cul de sac. I think I’m facing in the right direction but I’m not making any progress. My year has been filled with house keeping and career hunting, and I’m starting to feel the spiritual gap. I’m bored with both.

One of my clients is a devout Christian and in every Christmas letter and year-end greeting I draft for him, I have to wish the recipient a ‘spiritually enriching’ Christmas. So I’ve been thinking about how to have one myself.

I know that I operate at my highest levels when my emotional, physical, mental and spiritual aspects are in balance. I’m ok emotionally and mentally at the moment, but I’ve slacked off a bit in the physical realm in 2010. (Admittedly 2009 was a big health and body year – so maybe it’s natural to have a lull there) my spiritual life is non-existent. I want to meditate and observe more. I want to re-establish my connection with nature and the life force surrounding me. I want to be quiet.

So I’m setting that as a goal for this holiday, with the intention of carrying it through into 2011. Peace be with me.

HoneyChild

Preparing to float away

In the last two weeks I've felt a very definite shift in the way I relate to my employers and clients. It's like I've taken an emotional leap backwards, away from the fire of over-commitment and the stress associated with that. I can liken it to the metaphor that once came up in a reading for me about letting go and saying goodbye to someone who I loved, but who I could not have a functional relationship with.

The image is that of a leaf slowly changing its colours at autumn time, and as winter and the end of the leaf's life cycle on the tree approaches, it gradually separates itself from the branch until it can gently drop off and float away. There is no great pain or wrench of misery, which you may feel when you're still holding on tightly to something. It is just an easy, natural transition. This is what the reading was urging me to wait for when it came to leaving an important love interest behind. But the metaphor has stuck with me over the years and I think it accurately describes what I am now feeling around my current work relationships. I am in no rush, but I am preparing to move on. And that is the difference between the scenario in June, when I wasn't yet quite ready, and now.

Interesting opportunities are showing themselves to me and I am directing energy towards them.

HoneyChild

Playing the game

Two more coaching sessions down since I last wrote and I really am feeling different. Somehow I seem to be operating more and more easily from the place of an adult, rather than a child, and it’s showed up in how I’ve managed to handle some sticky work conversations around salary in the last week. The result? I’ve got a significant increase.

But I’ve also been left with the feeling that I’m tired of asking. The little child in me, the hole that needs to be nurtured by outside affirmation will always try to be filled up. But the adult version of me which is emerging is becoming more able to satisfy my own wants and needs. I need to remember to keep a space between the childish me and the adult me – to acknowledge the child but not let it be my downfall. I am the only person in the world who can look after myself.

In line with this, I have decided to start looking at new work opportunities. I think it will mean redefining my career - creating a position somewhere which meets my wants and needs fully. I need to be respected, supported, recognised and rewarded without asking for these things every six months. And maybe I need to do this in a different kind of organisation from my current work environment. I’m stepping into the game now, and I’m here to play.


HoneyChild